Do you?

fuck this goddamn world.......................... -.-

i have this problem. i'm jealous of humans. and you were like what you jealous of yourself lul? i'm jealous of humans which is so close to perfect. girls who have skinny legs. attention from people, even from the slightest things. perfect hair. well all the things, that i don't have. i'm jealous of people who have happy relationships, and i'm also jealous of people who are happy singles. i'm jealous of people who's rich, and got the money whenever they ask for it. jealous of the people who has so much freedom. jealous of the people who gets all the attention, even for the slightest things. jealous of the people, who everybody knew. in other words, famous.

none of us lives are perfect. yes, i do understand that but why does everyone i see is so close to perfect. i'm jealous of them being happy. i'm jealous of them putting a smile. be it a fake one. they just can. i'm jealous of people, who can do things without being afraid of it. i'm jealous of people who can get along well with other people. unfortunately i'm not that type of person. and that's why, i HATE myself. i HATE myself for being such an anti social bitch. i depend on people. sigh.

and you know what my whole point of saying this? most people in my school dont even know i existed. they don't even care. they don't even bother. i only have my closed ones. that hurts alot, you see? i wonder why, WHY some PRETTY girls go emo and say nobody cared. fuck you there's a whole bunch of guys and girls(?) who's infront of you and is there for you even for the slightest things. can't you fucking see?

let me tell you i'm jealous of whoever is reading this.

i'm jealous of the whole world.

which is why. right now. i hate myself. i never loved.